oops

not that big of a deal, not that big of a deal...

once again I fall into my own tempestuous sea of un-thought-of attitudes.

how can I begin to tell you that nothing is that big of a deal? how do I begin to tell you I'm not even into you anymore, that I just like your company? (but you do smell good, I'm not sure about it when you get too close) 

it's just that some impulses go trough me before I can filter them and I end up showing up when I shouldnt and sounding like an annoying egoistic bitch because I think I'm so insignificant that you wont even mind me there. then you act like you wish I hadn't just showed up, and it is confusing for me to matter that much to you. I mean, to the point where you wouldn't wanna see me at all.

am I crazy or is that it?